freakin!

i am totally freaking out! there was a burglary in my apartment building over the weekend - on my floor - 3 apartments away!!! and i just had a detective come to my door (when i looked through the peep hole and saw his badge i thought i was seriously under arrest...for a myriad of ridiculous reasons, such as bad financial decisions and poor choices in men...all serious offenses!) to ask me if i had seen or heard anything suspicious on friday night/saturday morning... yada yada yada. i supposedly live in a "secure" building! what does that even mean now!?! well, there is a door from the garage into the building that has been broken for some time and the officer said it is possible the perpetrators snuck in through the garage while someone was moving in on Saturday morning and forced his way in to the apartment down the hall. ugghhhhh. i am totally freaking out, not to be redundant. i am alone a lot (my fab new roomie and i aren't home together a lot) and it just got me thinking... number one, renters insurance is an amazing idea. and number two - just the idea of having someone home with you is so comforting. while i would prefer a six-foot-two-Tom Brady-look-alike, i will absolutely settle (lovingly so, jen) for my roommate. i use the deadbolt. i always lock the door lock no matter what. but what else can you possibly do? i guess maybe leave a radio on so it sounds like someone is home. get a dog. get a man. haha. take kickboxing (more likely to happen than the dog. or man). oh, i sooo not going to be able to sleep tonight. why i am being such a wimp? why am i acting like such a 'fraidy cat? cause it's a freaky, unnerving invasion of your privacy, of your intimate space and if it can happen down the hall...it can happen here.

ok so rationally i know it's not going to happen again - in this building, on this floor. tonight. while i'm home alone. and defenseless. but it's just the fact that it's so "close to home"... i was home when this was happening. while someone's apartment was being forced into and ransacked. who knows what kind of people do these things? i hear about these crazy, violent home invasions all the time on the news... like the one recently in newark. and - you know, i'm not one to live in fear of all the things that could happen. if things happen, i tend to go with the notion that there is a reason... at least i'd to think there is higher purpose for the terrible and scary things that happen to us. but who knows? maybe it's just all senseless. at any rate, i'm chaining the door and putting a chair in front of it. maybe sleeping with the light. i might recruit the bobby brady look-alike in the apartment above me to come keep me company... ok that was a little dramatic.