gobble gobble...

ok. my family has made me swear that i will not write about any of the events that transpired at our lovely thanksgiving feast. they each asked, for their own individual reasons, that i please, please, please not blog about such things as -- turkey place cards, my brother's new person, family friends, my grandmother's behavior, or my excessive consumption of alcohol. so i shall not. i will respect the wishes of my family -- my adoring, supportive, loving family. i won't discuss at length how my grandmother, whose normally questionable behavior and judgemental commentary usually provides fodder for hours of post-holiday dr. phil therapy sessions with me and my mom, was actually with it and conversational - almost pleasant. i certainly won't go into details about the festive martha stewart-inspired holiday decor that literally took on a life of its own in my mother's house. and i absolutely won't mention anything about how i have yet to bring home a family-worthy person of my own for a holiday, which my mother thinks is b/c i am just embarrassed by all of them (i will neither deny nor confirm that...). furthermore, i will say nothing regarding my increasing need for alcohol as the day wore on and how much more entertaining the holiday can actually be when you're four glasses of pinot grigio in (to say nothing of how amusing i can actually be when i am four glasses of pinot in...). so there. i will remain respectful of my family's wishes and keep it all to myself... until my book of witty commentary and observational humor (as well as family secrets) is finally published.